Just Sayin’

Ialways felt like the weird kid because divorce didn’t seem to be very common in my hometown. While I felt loved by both parents, I never felt like I had a real home. I spent Mondays and Tuesdays with my mom. Wednesday and Thursdays were spent with my dad. I rotated weekends. I can trace a lot of my anxiety to that time in my life.

It didn’t help that they strongly disliked each other. I felt put in the middle and torn. I remember longing to be an adult. I couldn’t wait to have my own home and family with a promise never to split it up.

I say all that to say this.

My childhood was all of those things. But there were so many unexpected blessings that I’m so grateful for. A stepsister who shared my love of Barbies and made those weekends at Dad’s extra fun. And a baby half-brother who came along when I was ten years old.

With that much of an age difference, we didn’t get to hang as much as kids as I wish we could have. But, as adults, he’s come out to KC many times for long visits during which we’ve really bonded. I’m lucky to have him. He’s one of the most solid humans I’ve ever known.

He got married a few weeks ago. I split time between my mom and dad just like I’ve done for all of these years. But this trip was different. Instead of the anxiety going home used to produce, I left with a feeling of peace. I have so much to be thankful for and so many people to love.

I flew home to the world I love the most and the family I’ve worked so hard to have. But my heart felt different this time. Just a little extra grateful for the road it took to get here.